So What?

EDU3093: Teachers and current issues. Lecturer: Mr.Md Nordin. Date: 24/06/2015

A day to remember. Yeah, that’s what I wanna say about my class today. It has been a while since I found a meaning, a satisfaction to be in a class. And gladly, in his class, I found the light that somehow makes my path illuminated. Before, science class with Madam Mahani, I also found myself happy to be in her lecture. Why? What is the similarity between these two great lecturers?

The answer is: they make you think.

Yeah. That is my honest answer. In Madam Mahani, she always forced us to think the unthinkable, pushed us to go beyond our comfort zone. I love it damn much when my brain is forced to think what I couldn’t try before. At least, my brain is working in her class, unlike others when you are just given input, input, input and that’s all thank you type of class.

The same goes with Mr.Md Nordin class. The way he explains things, it makes me reflect back of my own practical teaching and the way I conduct my life as a teacher. He just uses a simple method, ‘SO WHAT?’ formula. When he out of nowhere asked the question, instantly it knocked my down to my gut. ‘So What?’ Wow…I just can’t believe how strong the blow is.

Maybe for others, it is simply just another question that can be left unanswered. However for me, it makes me feel like a coward if I can’t answer that simple Q.

Before, I always questioned myself of why my students didn’t show any interest in my lesson. I said ‘they didn’t care enough of me, my teaching.’

SO WHAT?

I asked myself as I reflected back the situation.

So what? So what if they didn’t give a rat’s ass of me? Is that their fault? Or the fault is actually mine?

I said ‘I don’t know anymore how to teach them.’

So what? So what if they misbehaved? Am I gonna give up? Am I gonna change my profession? Am I going to ignore them as they ignore me?

Then…

SH*T!!!!

I am a trash. It’s my fault. I didn’t try enough.

That’s the answer of the ‘so whats’.

*sigh*

See? Before ‘so what’ happens, I always blame the students for my mistake. I thought that I had tried hard but I realized it’s not enough. Why am I always blame them, despise them whereby I couldn’t even accept that I have done wrong. Oh god, my ego is sure as big as the Mount Everest.

So, this so what has somehow changed me a bit, I believe.

Mr. Nordin also said about ‘Go Beyond’ in everything we’ve done. What does he mean is, we do not need to be ‘overboard’ or ‘pushover’, instead, we just need to do a little bit more effort to little things that we might have missed. For instance, just ask your students whether they are sleepy or their condition.

In my class, I have always focused on certain people that I think they have potential to go further if they tried a.k.a budak-budak yang memang dah pandai so called. But I seldom put myself in a place of the other ordinary kids where they need my attention too. I forget that they also need to be shown this little effort so that their motivation can be boost. I forgot that once upon a time, I was that little ‘average girl’, tiny little human who scared enough to try to do anything because I thought everybody else was better than me and I am just a little cockroach who nobody would give any single d**n about me.

So, if anybody would ever read this entry, I would like you to ask yourself this four Qs before you do anything.

1. WHAT IS?

2. WHY?

3. HOW TO?

4. SO WHAT?

I hereby admit my mistakes that I have done before. I am not a good teacher yet. No, I am not.